Father and daughter © fintag

News comments:
Something isn't right in England. We have the best football league, the best payed players and we own the copyright and yet on the world stage we are useless. We invented Tennis and Formula 1 and although we are trying hard, we just aren't their yet. We will hopefully win F1 but the drivers who represent the UK live in Monaco, not Guildford or Newcastle and our Wimbledon hopeful is Scottish who learned his trade in Spain.

Hedge fund managers are deserting these shores for foreign climates and London has no locals anymore (even I am an alien having invaded the place, via a short spell in HMP Ford (only kidding), from the West country). Our GBP is all over the place, Cameron is all over the place and the place is all over place too.

And yet England is the best country in the world for we invented most of the modern world and have caused most its current problems (Israel, Oil and Simon Cowell).

Today's shorts:
G20: More Useless Than England (ft)
Losses Cause Grief To Useless Hedgie (independent)

Today's longs:
Sea Creature Predicts Future: Hedge Fund Bidding Frenzy (bbc)

Gossip:
BP to be bailed out by Royal Dutch Shell.