Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Unexpected consequences

Vintage toys

Vintage toy © fintag

News comments:
We are experiencing some quite bizarre unexpected consequences.

Take RDR.
These three letters spell out Satan to an IFA. So what are the IFAs doing? Going off to Ireland and passporting and abandoning commissions for administration fees. The FSA are livid. (citywire)

Take smoking. In the good old days when we puffed like crazy, we all stayed thin. No wonder its a model's favorite past time. Now the lung cancer police have got their way, all those who would have smoked are now getting very fat. So what do we want? Thin people dying young or Fat people dying young? (telegraph)

Take Japan. It built (well the US did) nuclear power plants to withstand earthquakes and boy they certainly stood up well. Way beyond what they had been built to withstand. But what they forgot about was the water. You need water otherwise those hot rods cause nasty skin cancerous and internal body destroying radiation. They forgot to build them to withstand water. And now the green police have woken up and will soon be forcing us to wear sandals and eat grass [Editor: That was a bit Clarkson]. (guardian)

Take Mervyn King. He once lived next door to Ben Bernanke and wears academic glasses. Along comes Charlie Sheen and King has somehow absorbed his bi-winning radiation and is, well err turning weird. If that producer had kept his mouth shut then George Osbourne would be sleeping better.(cityam)

Take Libya. It has been run by a despot for many years and he was nicely contained. Along comes Tony Blair, a roman catholic, who forgives him and kisses his feet. The despot cannot believe his eyes and carries on being a despot with the West approving. Then his people have enough and the West stops and stares as thousands are slaughtered. Thankfully the great unwashed can watch cars on roofs and small children being rescued instead of facing up to the horrors of unnatural acts being perpetrated by human kind.(telegraph)

Today's shorts:
HuffAOL says all Americans are going to die tomorrow (huffpost)

Today's longs:
Markets enjoy some well needed volatility (marketwatch)

Motorised Erectors to be relaunched to solve the global impotency problem.